I fell on the ground. I bawled my eyes out. I ate a cookie. Actually who am I kidding, I ate a whole packet.

I sat in the food court of a shopping mall in Toronto staring into space. I closed my eyes as this wave of intense frustration took over my being. But at the same time I felt such deep gratitude for the MAGIC that has unfolded in my life this past week.

Have you ever felt 2 conflicting emotions at once? It’s like a push-pull energy of internal ping pong. Like a boy in high school playing hot & cold. Like a broken record playing only 2 words on repeat. Like a ‘boomerang’ clip on endless replay. Like an aircon that you can only set to snowman cool or volcanic heat.

I observed my inner experience with fascination. I acknowledged my negative and uncomfortable emotions with compassion.

Just sitting.
Just BEing.
Just allowing.

Today I felt lost. (I AM NOT).
Today I felt heart broken. (I AM NOT).
Today I felt overwhelmed. (I AM NOT).

These are states of our inner being.
These are not factual.

I also felt sadness.
I felt gratitude.
I felt frustration.
I felt connection.
I felt disappointment.
I felt happiness.
I felt total disconnection.

And there it was… That internal ping pong show charging through my being at full force.

I avoided eye contact with others.
Feeling completely disconnected from reality.

I felt like eating 10 packets of cookies plus a little more.
I felt like drinking 10 espresso martini’s plus a little more.
I felt like buying 10 sets of new clothes plus a little more.

How often do you act on these sabotaging urges of either filling a void or escaping your inner uncomfortableness?

How often do you go through this same pattern and ‘dealing mechanism’, each time something shows up to challenge you and move you into more growth, deeper truth and evolved awareness?

How often do you fill up your time and space with either work or other humans, simply to distract yourself from what is happening within you?

And how often… do you just hold space for your own emotions?

In this moment I held myself.

I reminded myself I am safe.
I reminded myself I am ok.
I reminded myself I am found.
I reminded myself I am love.
I reminded myself I am light.
I reminded myself I am truth.

I REMINDED MYSELF I AM EXACTLY WHERE I NEED TO BE FOR THE NEXT STAGE OF MY SOULS EVOLUTION.

Conscious growth is not about eliminating negative emotions.
Enlightenment is not about becoming ‘Perfect’.
Doing the ‘Deep inner work’ is not about becoming invincible.
This human experience is not about turning into a unicorn (as much as we joke about it).

This is a HUMAN EXPERIENCE. Not a shape shifting transformation into an invincible unicorn.

Today I share with you my inner experience to remind you that your humanness is more than ok! Your humanness is perfect.
And no matter how ‘enlightened’ or better version of Self you become, there will always be things to challenge you into further growth and evolution.

It is not your ‘invicibleness’ that matters.
(Yes making up words as I go).

IT IS ABOUT YOUR LEVEL OF AWARENESS OF SELF.
YOUR ABILITY TO HOLD SPACE FOR YOURSELF.
YOUR ABILITY TO SHIFT AND MOVE TROUGH YOUR SHADOWS, TRIGGERS AND EMOTIONS.

Today I also share with you my inner experience as an example to guide you into heightened awareness of your own emotions.
To help you connect to deeper emotional intelligence of Self.
To help you understand some of your patterns and unconscious habits and actions.

And today…
This challenging but beautiful experience has taken place in my life to remind me to surrender…

To #SURRENDER to the #BEingness of what #IS.

Because…

YOUR TRUTH WILL ALWAYS SET YOU FREE.

Thank you for reading.
Thank you for taking what you need out of this and applying it within.
Thank you for reaching out when you are ready to learn life transformative self-awareness tools to shift through your patterns, behaviours – and to learn deeper levels of self-love and emotional intelligence.

Want to call back your power?
– Start honouring your truth.

Want more self-confidence?
– Start honouring your truth.

Want more clarity, direction, connection and certainty?
– Start honouring your truth.

Pain is not you enemy.

PAIN IS YOUR GREATEST GIFT AND DEEPEST POWER.

Go within baby. Go within.

Love you.
Aho.

Linda x

Thank you for reading my messages from my soul. It is an honour to help you Awaken Awareness to yourSELF so that you can start thriving in Life, Business & Relationships.

~ In order to remember who you are you must first let go of who you ARE NOT ~